Miss March Blu-ray Review

"Miss March" on Blu-ray delivers a lackluster visual presentation marked by mediocrity. Encoded in AVC 1080p and framed at 1.85:1, the video transfer lacks dynamism and depth, reflecting a flat and bland image throughout. Lines may be adequately defined, but fine detail is significantly unimpressive. While the improved clarity of Blu-ray over standard definition is evident, the overall image fails to distinguish itself and appears similar to a sub-par HD television broadcast.

The color palette is rendered with adequate precision but does not stand out, failing to catch the eye even though it remains free of digital anomalies like dirt or debris. Occasionally, flesh tones tend to adopt a reddish hue, and the blacks are somewhat too bright, contributing to an overall lack of contrast and definition. The appearance of edge enhancement at intervals further detracts from the image quality, preventing it from achieving a film-like look. The transfer suffers in its entirety from a pronounced softness and the feel of an amateur home video. The resulting presentation is so flat that it barely meets the basic expectations for Blu-ray standards, offering minimal upgrade over a DVD counterpart.

The audio presentation of "Miss March" on Blu-ray, featuring a DTS-HD MA 5.1 lossless soundtrack, is adequate but lacks any notable highlights. The soundtrack occasionally comes alive during the rap songs, where bass can be felt permeating the listening environment to a satisfactory degree. However, these moments are fleeting, and the film’s score does little to stir any engagement. Rear speakers are underutilized, offering minimal support to the front channel and contributing to an overall lack of ambience. Dialogue reproduction is serviceable, with some instances of muffled speech but generally maintaining clarity.

In general, the "Miss March" DTS-HD MA 5.1 track meets the basic standards of audio quality without exceeding them. The soundscape remains largely uneventful, failing to provide an immersive experience. While there is nothing technically wrong with the track, it does not stand out in any significant way, leaving it one of the more forgettable soundtracks available in the medium. This disc performs adequately but leaves listeners desiring a richer and more dynamic auditory experience.

The Blu-ray release of "Miss March" contains both the theatrical and slightly extended unrated versions of the film. The extras are minimal but offer a mixed bag of additional content primarily delivered in standard definition. The Viral Videos include five short clips totaling 13:54 minutes, with one focusing on the film’s sound design and the others presenting character auditions. The 'Down & Dirty' featurette provides a brief, 2-minute insight into the film's vulgar rapper character, available in both censored and uncensored formats. Additionally, the second disc contains a digital copy of the film, which replicates the video and audio quality of the Blu-ray.

Extras included in this disc:

• Viral Videos: A collection of videos, including sound design and four character auditions.
• Down & Dirty: Short look at the obscene rap star, available in censored and uncensored versions.
• Digital Copy: Includes the same video and audio quality as the Blu-ray.

"Miss March" epitomizes the nadir of modern comedy, an unenviable feat for a film that leaves viewers questioning their life choices. The plot centers around Eugene (Zach Cregger), a chaste high school student giving abstinence seminars alongside his girlfriend, Cindi (Raquel Alessi). His best friend, Tucker (Trevor Moore), is infatuated with Playboy. After a party mishap, Eugene falls into a four-year coma, only to wake up and discover Cindi is now a Playboy centerfold. What follows is an insipid, cross-country journey to the Playboy mansion, filled with crude humor and nonsensical side plots.

Technically, the film is an abject failure. Every element—from plot structure to character development—fails to meet even sub-par expectations. Tucker's incessant glorification of his sexual exploits strains credulity and patience alike, making his character neither relatable nor comedic, but obnoxious. Moore’s overacting is so egregious that it warrants mention; his exaggerated expressions add nothing but more agony to an already miserable viewing experience. The side plot involving Tucker's girlfriend and her vengeful firefighter brother only amplifies the movie's deficiencies, adding unnecessary layers of vulgarity that do little more than distract from an implausible main story.

In conclusion, "Miss March" is a catastrophe, marked by amateurish acting, a juvenile script, and disjointed storytelling. Its reliance on vulgarity and shock value over wit and narrative coherence sinks it beyond redemption. The only merit this film holds is as a cautionary tale for aspiring filmmakers on what to avoid. Despite any initial curiosity one might have about its guilty-pleasure potential, the experience is unequivocally grating and ignoble—reliably delivering an unprecedented low in comedic cinema.

The Blu-ray release of "Miss March" struggles to find its footing, resulting in an unsatisfactory viewing experience on multiple fronts. The visual quality leaves much to be desired, with a bland and uninspired transfer that fails to leverage the high-definition format’s capabilities. Colors appear muted, detail levels are inconsistent, leading to a lackluster presentation that does not justify an investment in this Blu-ray release. Additionally, while the audio track is decent at best, with clear dialogue and satisfactory, if unremarkable, background scores, it does not compensate for the overall mediocrity of the transfer.

Compounding issues, the film itself is one to critically avoid. The comedic elements fall flat, delivering one of the least humorous and engaging narratives documented on Blu-ray. Practical and conceptual execution is vapid and devoid of entertainment value, making it a chore rather than an entertaining engagement. Adding insult to injury, the extras included in the Blu-ray release are virtually worthless, offering no significant insights or entertainment. When the accompanying trailers for other films such as 'Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li' and 'The Marine' become highlights, it underscores the poor quality of the main feature.

In conclusion, "Miss March" on Blu-ray is a regrettable addition to any collection. Its deficient visual transfer, mediocre audio quality, and insipid content warrant a firm recommendation against purchase or rental. Life is too short to spend time on such subpar entertainment when so many superior comedies are readily available. Miss March is undoubtedly a zero-star movie that should be avoided at all costs.